Super exhausted….
After the interment, kakalungkot na…ang daming nagbago…di pa rin ako nakakabawi ng tulog, Pero ok lang atleast kahit di ko napagsilbihan masyado si papa nung nasa hospital sya, nung wake nya super puyat ako sa pag entertain sa mga nakikiramay.
After Saturday….nag-usap usap kaming mag-kakapatid, we ask each other kung nagparamadam na ba sa kanila si Papa, and I was surprised na silang lahat my mga stories to tell…pero ako…as in wala.
I began to wonder …if its normal na ako wala akong mga ganung experience, like yung amoy ni papa, naamoy nila, or yung may biglang hanging malamig ang his presence was felt…etc.etc…
Mahal kaya ako ni Papa….or baka nagtatampo sya sa akin kasi hindi ko sya masyado naalagaan like what my sisters and brothers did?
During his last days, I seldom say “I Love You”….because I dont want to cry in front of him…
But God knows how I loved him…
It’s just that I am not the type of person who is very vocal of what I feel…
Medyo reserved ang emotions ko…
Pero sana one day….kahit sa panaginip makita ko si Papa…ang dami dami ko pang gustong sabihin sa kanya…sana mamaya, o kya bukas….basta one of this days…sana mangyari…
